6 days

Less than a week to go!!!

Im trying to kill time before my ultrasound... NO, Im not pregnant! lol

I have a pelvic ultrasound today.

For the past few months a week or so before my period I have.. well, a period. And then I get my regular one when I am supposed to. Its the most annoying thing in the world. Instead of having it monthly I have it twice a month.

This happened to me for a while last year also.

I also have been known to get quite a few cysts on my ovaries (sometimes quite painful).

So last year my doc switched my birth control pill to a higher hormone one. Well Im on pretty much the highest hormone one atm, so why is this happening again?

Anyways, thats what the ultrasound is for, I also have to get some blood work done today. And I see my doctor on Wednesday (day before I leave) so he should have all the results by then. Im sure its nothing serious, Im not worried. But I sure hope we can find the issue so I stop having multiple periods a month *rolls eyes* lol

It is gorgeous out again today so I think I will go for a nice long walk with the kids. I also need to fill the propane tank so I can bbq!!

The past couple days I havent eaten that great. And Im feeling bloated. Im not stressing or beating myself up about my food choices, I have continued to go for walks and drink tons of water. I dont feel out of control. And since today I can't eat until after my ultrasound, I plan to have a very healthy dinner. And get back on track. No more junk. I don't want to be bloated for the trip.

Rob agreed to working out while on vacation.

The plan is to get up and go straight to the gym in the mornings, then come back to our room and shower and get ready for the day. Doing it first thing, leaves no room for excuses.

I even mentioned it to my mom and she would also like to join us some days.

Oh and I have the best husband ever. He sent me flowers all the way from work. For no reason other than he loves me :D <3

10 Days

Had my WI today and was down 2 lbs :)
That was still without any exercise, well, I did get a couple days of walking in, but walking never feels like work.

I went and had my fit assessment today with Abby, the personal trainer I mentioned last post.
It went pretty much how I expected. I'm not in good shape so it showed. But she did say I had pretty good core strength so its not like I'm starting from scratch.
She charges $25 an hour!! So happy about that! Very affordable! And since I wont be able to come to her when Rob is out of town (at least not very often) she will also help me with making a plan for when I go to the gym or even for me at home. For an extra charge of $10.
She was really nice and I didn't feel uncomfortable with her. So after my trip I will get in touch with her to start a plan. She recommended that I work mainly on cardio, she said swimming would be a really good idea for me since my shins hurt a lot when I do jumping or running.
And since there is a swimming pool in Servus, she said I should do half an hour of laps and then go up to the gym and work on upper body machines, as well as stuff like crunches and lunges. She will put together a daily plan for me. and I can just follow that when I am working out alone.
She took my measurements and all that fun stuff lol so she can keep track monthly. I weighed nearly 8 lbs more on her scale, mind you I had eaten, was wearing a sweater and shoes, so I was expecting it to be more.
Other than that I don't really have much else to talk about today.
Tomorrow is Atreyu's 5th birthday. Gonna take him to spend some birthday money, as well as to Galaxy land play park with Sabrina and Jenn and the kids :) Should be fun!

13 days

Went to value village today.. love that place.
I found an awesome dress for $15 that I can wear in the Dominican and some tops for $6 each.
Also found a lovely beach hat so I don't burn my face like my SIL did while they were there lol.
I'm pretty much already packed to go lol, everything other than things I use daily anyways.
I wouldn't mind finding some shorts though. I have Capri's I can roll up pretty high, and I'm assuming I will be in my bathing suit quite a bit too, I have a couple dresses also. So I'm pretty much set.
Rob on the other hand will have ONE day to do his shopping for clothes/shoes when he gets home.

I just went and dropped a check off to order some lingerie (surprise for Rob on our trip :D). That should be in on Friday.
I'm super excited. And the fact I am allowing myself to be more excited that I'm even going at all rather  than nervous and worried about what I'm gonna look like is making things a lot easier on myself.
I don't feel so much pressure anymore. Its easier to make the right choices right now.
I love it.

I stopped over to drop that check off to Misty's house. And she is the one who originally talked about the "Biggest Loser" challenge. Some of the moms had a play date today (I was busy so I didn't go) but they talked about details, so Misty filled me in.
Its gonna start the week after Easter, so yay, cause I will be back.
It's gonna be 6 weeks long.
Everyone will put in $25. And the WI will be semi private. So if you choose to, you can just have one other lady come in the room while you WI.
Also you don't have to be a part of the challenge, you can just come for support if that's what you want.
Some of the money will go towards weekly prizes for the biggest loser of the week. And weight loss will work on percentage so that its fair for everyone.
Also, you don't HAVE to WI every week in order to win the final prize (money) You just have to WI the first night and the last night, but of course then you can't win weekly prizes.
They also thought it would be good to have to put in a dollar if you gain. I like that idea too.
I'm totally excited about this.
I'm also pretty sure in my last 2 posts I have said excited about 8172381723 times lol

14 days.

Its snowing :( wtf Alberta weather!? It was so nice out and there was barely any snow left! grrrr.

A lady on a moms group that I joined on face book for the town I live in wants to start a "Biggest Loser" group. I'm freaking stoked about it.

I'm not sure on the exact details, but we all put some money in in the beginning, and then we WI weekly at one of the ladies houses. I think you can win weekly prizes with part of the money from everyone who joined. But in the end (not sure how long it runs) the "Biggest Loser" gets the cash :D

Even if I don't win the cash, I think this is going to motivate me so much! To have to go and WI in front of the ladies and have the support in person is going to be great for me!

I also found a personal trainer in my little town. She has a gym set up in her house. And I go over there on Monday to do a free fit assessment and talk to her about what I want from her if I choose to go with her.

I'm so excited for this. Mind you, I'm not sure on what her price is just yet lol, but Mothers day is coming up.. I think I'm gonna ask for at least a few sessions.

She said the assessment will help show her my fitness level and she can then make a workout for ME and what I'm capable of.

Seriously so happy about this!

When Rob is out of town I will hire a sitter for the hour or so that I am there, and then of course when he is home I don't have to worry about having a sitter.

I found this great idea on pinterest awhile ago

I am gonna start it once I get back from my trip.

15 days

So I had WI on Monday and I was down 6.1 lbs :)
Its always nice when the first week back on track is a great one weight wise.

Ive got 2 more weeks until I leave... wow.. excited and nervous. Nervous still because I hate wearing swimsuits and shorts and such. And there is about 60 people going in the group. But I know once I'm there I wont be thinking about that so much.. especially due to the fact that its all inclusive and I will have NO KIDS.. bring on the rum lol.
No, in all seriousness I don't plan to get too smashed most nights. The night that the ladies go out will probably be as bad as it gets. But I have really good intentions and plan on using the in resort gym at least a few times.
When I tell people that I plan to use the gym there they look at me like I'm crazy. But I have been on "vacation" from my healthy lifestyle for a few months now. And I am feeling really committed at this point. Not to mention I will be drinking and eating foods I wouldn't normally be eating while home. So in order to come home and not feel like a bloated pig I need to work some of it off. And hopefully I will not have gained too much while there.
I also plan on swimming, walking and doing lots of activities so that will add to it as well.
I'm not really worried about gaining a bunch of weight while there. Its after I get back that scares me.
Once I get in the mind frame of just letting go and having fun I have a hard time getting my grip back, so the plan is to not let go of it just yet lol.

In other news, I had a dentist appointment today.. they couldn't do anything because for the past couple days I haven't been able to open my mouth properly. I can talk just fine. But I can only extend my jaw enough that I can't even fit a grape in... so yeah haven't been able to eat much, at least not without extreme pain from forcing my jaw open :(
Anyways he said it is from my wisdom teeth and I REALLY need to get them out. He recommended in the next 2 weeks. He gave me a prescription so that I don't get an infection in the mean while.
I had already gone in and had my consult to have them removed. I just need to fax in some papers. I will probably just go in and drop them off tomorrow and talk to them in person.
I'm not sure what the eff I'm gonna do though because I need someone to watch the kids and pick me up after it and Rob is out of town at work and my SIL is going out of town Saturday until the following Saturday.
So I would only have a 3 day period where I am able to do it before my trip.. but really do I want a sore mouth while I'm there?
My jaw being stuck like this sucks majorly, and hurts when I force it open, but its not a constant pain and it doesn't hurt when I chew once I force the food in there.
I'm just gonna have to wait until after my trip.
Ibuprofen does help the swelling and allows me to open my jaw a little more, so I will just have to stick with pain meds for now.
I don't really have another option.
I can't really eat many things other than soup and even then I have a hard time getting the spoon in my mouth, at least it might help with Mondays WI lol.

18 days

I havent posted in a little while, and I am still struggling (kinda) its a battle every day, but I have been doing really well the past week or so, and WI day is tomorrow and Im hoping for some good results. I feel smaller, not so bloated anyways.

Our Dominican trip is in 18 days! I have been struggling with extreme shame over how badly I have been doing and how I gained all the weight back. I had 2 years to lose weight for my brothers wedding and Im pretty much only going to have lost maybe 20lbs.
Im trying to just let that go, and move on, and not pressure myself so bad.
I know everyone loves me despite my weight.
I think a big thing is just that its for Adam's wedding. I never think about this, because I love him so much, but he was soo mean to me growing up, and bugged me DAILY about being over weight as a kid.
I don't remember anyone else ever making fun of my weight. But I think because he was my older brother I needed his approval, but I felt worthless cause he made me feel like being fat/chubby was such a gross and horrible thing, and I was fat.
Im so much more over weight now, and a part of me feels like he is going to be dissapointed that I didn't drop the weight for his wedding.
I havent seen him in a long time so he doesn't know what size I am.
My heart is in my throat just thinking that I will have dissapointed him.
I know he loves me and we are adults now so I know he will just be glad Im there and a part of the wedding. But that little girl in me who was teased by her brother her whole childhood is scared.
My feeling like he is going to be disappointed is probably just ME, and my insecurities, but its ingrained in me.
With that said, I am trying my hardest right now, I did lose weight.. I just gained it back lol. But all in all thats better than never having dropped any and still gained more.
Its a journey, it really is. Im learning more about myself with every fall I take. I get back up, and try something new.
Thats really all I can do.
Thats really all anyone can do.
Im proud of myself for trying to overcome thins so many times. And slowly but surely I will get there :)